Dirty Jokes 3

Girl: Babe I just gotta a tattoo of a sea shell on my thigh can you hear the ocean?  *Pulls his head to her thigh*   Guy: Nope, But I sure can smell the fish.
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A little boy and girl are sitting in a bathtub together. The girl looks down and asks, "Can I touch it?" The boy replies, "No, you already broke yours off!"
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Andy and Annie are watching one of those television preachers on TV one night.   The preacher faces the camera, and announces, “My friends, I’d like to share my healing powers with everyone watching this program. Place one hand on top of your TV & the other hand on the part of your body which ails you and I will heal you.”  Annie has been having terrible stomach problems, so she places one hand on the television, and her other hand on her stomach.  Meanwhile, Andy approaches the television, placing one hand on top of the TV and his other hand on his groin.  With a frown Annie says, “Andy, he’s talking about healing the sick, not raising the dead.”
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Little Billy came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard.  Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air.  When his Dad came home Billy said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are his legs sticking in the air?"  His father thinking quickly said, "Son, thats so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven."  "Gee Dad thats great," said little Billy.  A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Billy rushed out to meet him yelling, "Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!"   "What do you mean?" said Dad.  "Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air screaming, "Jesus Im coming, Im coming" If it hadnt of been for Uncle George holding her down wed have lost her for sure!"
🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂 .