Akpos Jokes 16

Weweechu

Akpos and his Girlfriend were taking a romantic walk down the beach one cold night. Akpos grabbed the girl's hands, drew her closer to himself, kissed her and said, "Baby, you know I love you so much. There's no one here. Its just the two of us, let's do 'WEWEECHU'." The girl looked around and said, "My love, I don't want to do 'WEWEECHU' please. Let's just hold hands and cuddle." Akpos agreed. After a while, Akpos asked her again, "Oh baby, my love, please Let's do 'WEWEECHU'!" The girl replied, "Baby, don't rush me. I don't want to do it. I just want to be wrapped in your arms." Akpos calmed down.After a long while, Akpos couldn't hold it any longer. He said, "My heartbeat, it's not fair oh! Let's do 'WEWEECHU' na! We haven't done it since last year oh! Let's do it now now." The girl reluctantly agreed. Akpos immediately grabbed her closer to himself, hugged her tightly, brought out the guitar strapped to his back and they both start singing, "WEWEECHU A MERRY CHRISTMAS! WEWEECHU A MERRY CHRISTMAS! WEWEECHU A MERRY CHRISTMAS! AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!"Got you didn't I?! Dirty minds! What were you thinking 'WEWEECHU was?
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Best Interview

Akpos is a footballer who plays for one of the leading clubs in the world. His team-mates advised him to prepare answers in advance for post-match interviews because his English isnt that good. They had a few mock interviews, and told him to answer exactly the same way during the live interviews because they usually ask the same questions. But it backfired spectacularly, as this never-before-seen interview shows.REPORTER: Akpos, firstly, I hear that your wife is pregnant. Thats fantastic news, Congratulations!AKPOS: Yes, thank you. All credits goes to my teammates. Everyone worked hard for it, especially Emake Chiguoze. It was a tight situation when he came in, but his performance was great, with the help from Taiwo Ogunsanya, who looked like he was really enjoying himself. Special thanks to Kwame Adjo for finding space from impossibly tight angles. And not forgetting George Abbey, who showed lots of energy when everyone was tired.The reporter fainted!
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War Story

During an English lesson, the teacher instructed his students to write a composition.Question: Assume you are in a war, write a story on your experience?Akpos did not write anything and kept seated. The teacher got puzzled, walked to Akpos' desk and asked him why he was not doing the exercise.Akpos replied, "I was killed immediately at the beginning of the war."
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Sexy Sister-in-Law

Akpos had a girlfriend who was stunningly attractive, and his girlfriend had a sister who was more attractive. Just a day before their wedding, Akpos visited his girlfriend, he saw no one but his girlfriend's sister. While checking the wedding invitation together, She suddenly said to Akpos, "Come and keep me company." while slowly undressing.  She continued, I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me. Akpos was stunned and frozen in shock as he watched her go up the stairs. He stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. Akpos opened the door, and headed straight towards his car. Lo and behold, his entire future family was standing outside, all clapping!With tears in his eyes, his father-in-law hugged him and said, We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family. Akpos thought, "Thank God I forgot the condoms in the car."
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Akpors and The Police.

POLICE: Knock knock!

AKPORS: Who is knocking?

POLICE: Police.

AKPORS: What do you want?

POLICE: to talk.

AKPORS: How many are you?

POLICE: We are two.

AKPORS: Then talk to each other!
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Chemistry class

TEACHER: Class, what is the chemical symbol for Sodium?AKPOS: Na sir.TEACHER: What is the chemical symbol for Barium?AKPOS: Ba sir.TEACHER: What will you get if one atom of Ba is added to two atoms of Na?AKPOS: Banana sir
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Future Tense

TEACHER: "I killed a person", convert it to future tense.AKPOS: The future tense is, "You will go to jail".
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The Frog

A biology teacher draws a frog on the board:
TEACHER: Who can tell me what I just drew on the board? AKPOS: (raises his hand and stood up) You sir!Akpos has been expelled from school.
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Who Is A Pharmacist?

One day, Akpos was in class when the teacher walked in. After teaching for sometime, the teacher decided to make the class an interactive one. Here's what ensued...TEACHER: Who is a pharmacist?Only Akpos raised up his hand.TEACHER: Is it only Akpos who's in this class?Still there was nobody else to answer the question except Akpos.TEACHER: Ok Akpos, answer the question. But before you do, take this cane and beat everybody in the class with it.Akpos, filled with happiness, did as his teacher said and beat all his classmates with the cane in his hands.TEACHER: Now you can answer the question Akpors. Tell these dumb studentswho a pharmacist is.AKPOS: A pharmacist is a farmer who assist people.The teacher fainted!
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Jews in Nigeria

Akpos friend, Kwame who is from Ghana, asks Akpos if they have any Jews living in Nigeria. Akpos replies, "Definitely! We have orange jews, apple jews, grape jews... etc
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