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Tuesday, December 11, 2018

Just laugh on this one

A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him.

"Pardon me," she said, "I'm sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It's just that you look just like my son, who just died recently."

"I'm very sorry," replied the young man, "is there anything I can do for you?"

"Yes," she said, "As I'm leaving, can you say 'Good bye, Mother!' ? It would make me feel so much better."

"Sure," answered the young man.

As the old woman was leaving, he called out, "Goodbye, Mother!"

As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he saw that his total was $127.50.

"How can that be?" he asked, "I only purchased a few things!"

"Your mother said that you would pay for her," said the clerk. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

A boy wanted to have sex with his girlfriend. But she was refusing all the time. So he went to see his friend and asked him what to do about it. His friend had a brilliant plan. He said: "Next time you meet her under the tree behind your home. I will be up in the tree waiting for you. If she refuses again you ask God in the heaven whether you can have sex with her or not. And I will give the right answer to you and her."

The days went by and one Saturday afternoon he met his girlfriend again. They both went to that tree and he asked her to have sex. She refused. So he said to her: "And, my dear, if I ask God in heaven, would you follow his advise?" "Yes, I would" she said. So he asked: "Father in heaven can I have sex with my girlfriend?" And the voice from heaven said: "OK my friend, go ahead!" And so they had sex the first time.

But the boy asked his friend to do him this favor every week, and he did. But the last time when he asked God in heaven, the father answered: "My dear friend below, step aside and let your father in heaven have a go!"

Answer me this Jokes 7

Q: What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist?
A: The genealogist checks the family tree and the gynecologist checks the family bush.
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Q: If Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Al Gore, and Tipper took a boat ride and the boat capsized, who would be saved?A: The United States of America!
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Q: What do a bungee jump cord and a hooker have in common?   A: If the rubber breaks you're screwed.
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Q: Why did the farmer call his pig "Ink"?A: Because it was always running out of the pen.
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Q: What did the dad buffalo say to his son on the first day of school?  A: Bison.
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Answer me this Jokes 6

Q: What do you get when you cross a rooster with a jar of peanut butter?  A: A cock that sticks to the roof of your mouth.
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Q: Why did the lion brake up with his girlfriend?  A: Cuz she was a CHEETAH!
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Q: Why are ghosts bad liars?
A: You can see right through them.
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Q: Why did the fish blush?
A: Because it saw the ocean's bottom.
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Q: What word begins with the letter "F" and ends in "UCK"?A: FIRETRUCK.
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